


Beneath The Stains Of Time

by FruityTootyMarvelBooty



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Real Person Fiction, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Chris Hemsworth is a sweetheart, Death, Disfigurement, F/M, First Dates, Kidnapping, Knife Wounds, M/M, Murder, Neighbors, Non-Consensual Bondage, Parent Frigga (Marvel), Past Rape/Non-con, Protective Frigga (Marvel), Psychological Trauma, Scars, Sif is a cat, Support Groups, Therapy, Violence, Years after the attack, car jacking, emotional scars, numb, past major character death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-22
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2018-12-17 16:00:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11854935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FruityTootyMarvelBooty/pseuds/FruityTootyMarvelBooty
Summary: Years after his mother was killed and he was attacked and disfigured, Twenty-Nine year old Loki is still trying to move on with his life. Especially since he's developed a crush on his new neighbor, who doesn't seem afraid of Loki's scars and has tragedy of his own locked away.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title inspired by Hurt by Nine Inch Nails/Johnny Cash.

 

> _**It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.** _
> 
> _**-Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy** _

 

_******************************* _

 

> **_If chaos is a masterpiece,_ **  
>  **_Then you should see my heart._ **  
>  **_If battle scars are beautiful,_ **  
>  **_Then I'm a work of art._ **
> 
> **_Kyra Jackson_ **

 

_******************************* _

 

Someone once said that time heals all wounds. But to Loki, whoever said that is a lying sack of shit. From the moment he opened his eyes in the morning, throughout the day, and until he closes his eyes at night, he still remembers.

It's been almost ten years since he and his mother were attacked, and nothing hasn't come close to healing, except for the scars on Loki's face. [One](https://i.pinimg.com/236x/f1/47/1f/f1471f6977e4550ee222d116a86f30f6--facials-bodies.jpg) going down above his left brow, two running down his left cheek, [one](http://photos1.blogger.com/hello/216/6045/320/_42010700_woodhamscut203.jpg) long on on his other cheek that goes up a ways on his nose, and [one](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/61/36/13/61361387e54aad13e89b9e1b63ded8c0.jpg) below the right side of his bottom lip, moving down his chin. 

He was nineteen when it happened. He and his mother were out shopping together shopping for stuff he'd need for college. He was going to study acting and possibly make a career out of it. But once they got back to their car, they were distracted talking about a movie they wanted to see, when a man got in the backseat. 

He had a gun aimed at Loki's head and demanded she started driving. While she did he gave her directions and it was at a remote location. When they got there, he proceeded to shoot her in the head, killing her before attacking Loki. The teen tried to run, but his attacker shot him in the leg and dragged him back to the car. He forced him into the backseat, bound his wrists with wire, and raped him. He was a virgin when it happened. 

He fought with all he had, but he couldn't move too much because of his leg. His attacker had him on his stomach during it, petting and running his fingers through the teens ebony locks as he did.

One thing he'll never forget hearing was the man calling Loki his pretty boy and once he was done, he turned the teen back onto his back and pulled out a pocket knife. He said "Now you won't be pretty anymore." And cut up his face, leaving behind the scars he has now. He did it because he said no one else will get to have his pretty boy like he did, and he was right. Who would want to love someone who looks the way he does? 

After disfiguring Loki, the man was gone. The teen had no idea what the man looked like, only that he was tall, strong, wore black jeans, a plain white shirt, grey jacket, and a skull bandana that covered his face, except the holes for the eyes. Loki wouldn't be able to identify him, so he just left. 

It took hours for the teen to get to the closest road. He couldn't walk and the pain in his rear hurt so bad, so he got down flat on his stomach and crawled, until he reached the highway. He screamed until his voice was shot, and someone finally stopped. It was a sweet older man, he helped Loki into his truck and drove him to the closest hospital. 

Loki had no family. His father died when he was thirteen, and his mother was the only one he had left. The sweet man stayed with Loki while they operated on him and took care of him, and when he was discharged, the man let him stay in his house with his lovely wife until he could get back on his feet. Ten years later, and he still keeps in contact with the man and his wife.

His dreams of becoming and actor have been shattered. He worked two jobs while living with them, and still went to college. He worked his ass off and got a degree in Psychology, and he's now Dr. Loki Laufeyson. He works in a therapy center and feels like he has a sort of connection with his patients. Especially if his patients have gone through a certain traumatic experience, he can empathize. 

He got shot in his calf, the bullet went all the way through and out, shattered bone, so now he walks with a bit of a limp. He lives in a small flat in London with his cat [Sif](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/b6/da/43/b6da43a0cc4ed559204cc762ec735f75--pretty-cats-beautiful-cats.jpg). Or Lady Sif depending on his mood. She's the Queen of everything and will one day rule London with an iron fist. 

 

***************************

 

He didn't sleep well that night. When he woke up, his room was dark, a small fraction of light shining through a crack in the curtains. He turned over a little onto his back and stared at the ceiling. 

Sometimes he stares for a few minutes before he has to get up and start his day. Some days he doesn't feel up enough to go to work and calls in sick. And right now, it seems like today will be one of those days. 

He sighed and forced himself up to sitting position, before moving over to the edge of the bed. He jumped a little when he heard a mewl and felt something touching his ankle. He looked down and sure enough, Sif was rubbing against him, purring. 

He smiled and said "So that's where you went off to." He leaned down and carefully picked her up, his fingers sinking into the deep fur as he held her onto her hind legs. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head and said "Good morning, my Love. How are we today?" The feline mewled and purred as Loki scratched under her chin, her eyes closing.

The man sighed and said "I think today will be one of those days, Darling. You just might get Daddy all to yourself today." The feline mewled again and Loki gently set her back down onto the floor. He stood and stretched his arms out before saying "Let's get some breakfast, yeah? I'm sure your starving to death." Smiling as the feline followed right behind him to the kitchen. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Checking the mail can be fun. Would you like to go out on a date?

After feeding her Royal Highness, he grabbed a banana, ate half of it, and threw the rest away. He's had trouble with eating ever since the attack. Some days he has three meals, some two, and sometimes one a day. 

He has to force himself to eat sometimes, because he knows his body needs it. But same days, he could fucking care less. He's had trouble with a lot of things since his mother and him were attacked. Dating, having friends, focusing with work. He keeps to himself, keeps his head down most of the time to avoid the stares he gets.

For the first few years, he used to wear a surgical mask over his mouth to try and hide the scar on his chin and parts of the ones on his cheek until he reached a point of _'fuck it'_ and took it off. If people were gonna stare, he wouldn't care. Then he started caring again, worried every single person from the moment he leaves his flat, is staring at him. Judging him. 

He hasn't had any intimacy with another person in _years._ In ten years he's had sex maybe...Four times? Three? If you include the man that ruined his life. Three years after the attack, he had sex with a very nice girl name Lily. It was a one time thing, but she was very nice, and so incredibly shy. He had finally decided he need to blow off a little steam from the stress.

They did it in her car, they hardly spoken a word before, during, and after. Just was an awkward entanglement of moans, grunts, and discomfort from being in the backseat. The next time was with a man...Walter. Middle aged, very charming, and strong. Sort of like the fat strong. He was a little rough for an instance and Loki nearly freaked out but told him to be gentler with him, and so he did, but it still worries him. 

Any other intimacy he's had, was him using his own hand and sometimes watching porn. Gay, straight, he has no preference. He's sure he's bisexual, obviously since he's had both, but he never let's anyone too close beyond that to really know. 

He doesn't really know himself, actually. He used to. He used to know all the things he loved, hated. But after that day, it all just stopped. It's like he was killed that day along with his mother. 

He knows he shouldn't let that man win. Well technically he already has, for all Loki knows, he must still be alive and well, living God knows where, doing God knows what, being God knows who. If he's dead, then good, fuck him, he can burn in Hell and be forever impaled on Satan's monstrous cock shoved in his ass, going all the way through his body, and popping out of his mouth.

That sounds like a fitting punishment for him. Whether he's dead or will be dead, it sounds quite nice to Loki. Poetic. James Joyce should've written something like that. Though some people say that those who are broken tend to be stronger, Loki too, thinks that's a load of shit. 

 

***************************

 

After eating he showered, quickly getting himself off before cleaning himself up, and realized he needed to check the mail. He groaned and said "Sif, Darling, Daddy will be right back. He just needs to check the mail. Don't burn the place down while I'm gone." 

She mewled and he closed and locked the door before heading down towards the stairs. He lives on the fourth floor, but he never takes the elevators unless he has to. He doesn't mind going up and down the stairs alp the time, he likes the workout. 

As he walked down the stairs, he ignored the stares of a teenage girl going up. When he reached the bottom of the stairs, he could hear laughter. When he made it to the mailboxes, he saw his new neighbor laughing with an older woman. She's very sweet, he's had a few conversations with her. She doesn't seem to notice the scars on Loki's face. Perhaps one reason was, her face was partially burned. A fire in her house when she was younger. 

His new neighbor was a man. He's in his early thirties, Australian, and very attractive. Loki wouldn't really mind blowing off some steam with him. He moved in almost a month ago, so he's not exactly new anymore, but still.

They've had maybe four conversations, with a few sentences uttered to one another. But he's nice. He's a very nice man. His name is Chris. He's got gorgeous eyes, beautiful smile, and what from Loki could tell, a great body. He's had more than one fantasy about him. He's noticed a few instances where he's seen the way the Aussie has looked at him.

He gets very self conscious around him. First of all, he's quite possibly the hottest man he's ever seen in his life. Two, he's well aware of the ugliness on his own face while looking st the flawlessness of his. And three, he knows Chris is aware of the ugliness on Loki's face, but probably tends to ignore it. 

The sweet lady smiles brightly at Loki and said "Loki, oh hello Dear! How are you?"

He smiled at her and said "Just fine, and yourself?"

She laughed and said "Oh I'm wonderful, but this handsome Devil here better stop flirting with me!"

Chris grinned and said "Oh, but I can't help myself, Ellen, you look so wonderful today, truly stunning. When I first saw you, I thought I was looking at Rita Hayworth."

She playfully pushed at his shoulder and Loki smiled. He asked "Wait, you're telling me this is _not_ Rita Hayworth?"

The blush on her face deepened and she pointed a finger at him and said "Oh don't you start with me, you're both terrible." His smiled widened and she said "I have to get back, have a blessed day, boys."

They nodded and smiled at her and as she moved towards the elevators, Loki called out "Good day, Mrs. Hayworth!" And they chuckled.

Chris smiled at him and said "Well, I think that's one of the highlights of my morning."

The Brit chuckled and said "Same for me. She's a wonderful woman. She'll find out your birthday somehow and when that day comes, be ready for a knock at your door and a cake."

He grinned and said "Well, that sounds great. How does she find out peoples birthdays?"

Loki shrugged and said "I have no clue. But we all just go with it, she's so nice."

This was the most they've spoken, and Loki was beginning to feel warm. He went and checked his mailbox, examining what appeared to be junk, before closing and locking it up.

He nodded at the Aussie and said "See you." Before turning to go to the staircase. He mentally kicked himself and as he started up, he heard footsteps behind him and the Aussie calling his name. 

He turned and Chris smiled at him. He said "Sorry, but um...I was wondering if...If you'd maybe like to go on a date with me, sometime...Maybe tomorrow night if you're not busy?"

Loki sure wasn't expecting that. He hasn't had a date in years. He doesn't do dates, just sex, that's it. But ever since Chris moved in, and to his luck he lives down the hall from the Brit, he's felt...Different. Maybe it's a crush, maybe not. Maybe it's just the overwhelming desire to jump on him and have this man fuck him in front of the whole building, but he kinda likes it. 

He stood there speechless for a minute, before he snapped out of it and smiled a little. "Y-Yeah, okay. That sounds nice, um...What uh, what about tonight?"

He smiled and said "Okay, tonight then."

The Brit nodded and asked "Do you have anything particular in mind?" Shifting on his foot, putting his hand on his hip. 

The Aussie nodded and said "Yeah, I thought we can grab a drink, maybe dinner afterwards. I know a place down the road. I'll drop by at six, is that okay?"

Loki nodded and said "Yeah.." He grinned and said "That's fine. I'll uh. I'll see you then...Bye." He quickly turned and went up the stairs, forgetting that Chris lives on the same floor, right down the hall from him. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Daddy get laid tonight? The date. Chris being a sweetheart, Loki throwing sass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep almost calling Loki, Tom, geez xD.

When Loki got back to his flat, his heart was racing and his whole body was really warm. Sif was quick to be at his feet, going in little figure eights, rubbing herself all over him.

He grinned down at her and squatted down, petting and scratching at her fur. He said "I'm back, my Love. Guess what, Sif? Daddy has a date tonight. Yeah, with a nice man down the hall. Yeah, I wasn't expecting it either. Will Daddy get laid for the first time in years? Maybe. Fingers crossed, Darling." Tossing the junk off to the side, and gathering up the feline in his arms. 

 

***************************

 

By the time it was six, Loki was ready to go. Part of him wanted sex with Chris tonight, but part of him didn't wanna seem easy. Chris is a nice guy, even though he's sure he wouldn't let Chris get any closer beyond dates and sex.

He got a knock on his door and smiled as he quickly made his way to the front door. He took a deep breath and opened it, revealing Chris. He looked good, as always. His short hair neatly styled, some product put in. He was dressed in dark jeans, white shirt, black leather jacket. Not too fancy, not too plain. For a man that looks lime Chris, he always looks far from plain. Tom was dressed sort of the same, except dark jeans and a grey shirt.

They smiled at each other and Chris said "Hello. You look beautiful." 

Loki chuckled and said "Oh please."

Chris smiled genuinely and said "What? I mean it."

The Brit nodded and said "Yeah, okay, come on." 

 

***************************

 

Chris was right, the place they went to was right down the road. It was a pub, not very crowded, and they sat in a booth, away from everyone. 

"So how long have you lived in London?" The Aussie asked, taking a sip of his beer.

Loki said "Almost four years. I'm originally from Westminster, but we moved to the States when I was young and well...I moved back. And you?"

The Aussie nodded and said "Two years. I had a different flat when I first moved here, but I found a better one and well, here I am. I'm originally from Melbourne, Australia. In case the accent wasn't obvious enough. Lived there and the States for a long time, thought I needed a change and well."

The Brit nodded and asked "So what do you do for a living?" 

Chris smiled and said "I got transferred with the marketing company I work for. It's not very exciting, can be very boring."

The two laughed and Loki said "Well I beg to differ. I'm sure marketing sounds more exciting than being a therapist."

The Aussie asked "Ohhh so you are a therapist?"

The Brit nodded and said "Yes. I went through hell working for my degree...I originally wanted to be an actor, but...It's obvious that won't be happening any time soon." A hint of sadness in his tone. 

The Aussie shook my head and said "Not necessarily. I would definitely pay to see you."

Loki just shook his head and quietly said "You'd be the only one then." Before taking a sip of his own beer.

Chris leaned forward a little in his seat, his eyes catching the Brit's and he smiled. "I disagree."

 

***************************

 

"I was not expecting this, honestly." Loki said after they got their second drink, and some food. The door here was very good, and he knows he should eat here more often.

Chris looked up from his plate and asked "Why's that?"

Loki shrugged and said "Well for one, I had no clue if you were attracted to me or any other man, and I wasn't gonna ask. Two, I don't ever get asked out, and I haven't been on a date in years."

The Aussie nearly choked on a piece of his food and asked "Years? Really? Define years."

The Brit said "About ten years, yeah."

Chris shook his head and said "I don't believe that. You must have people killing each other to have you."

Loki shook his head and said "I don't. You probably have to, but in case you haven't noticed the huge scars on my face, well, that's one reason why."

Chris chuckled and said "I am aware, but if I just met you and saw you somewhere, I would've asked you out on the spot, without a doubt. Just because you have scars, doesn't mean you're undatable."

The Brit shook his head and said "I wish I could believe that."

Chris said "Well it's the truth, Loki. You're incredibly beautiful, not to be forward, but it"s true. And the fact that you're nice and don't have a shit personality, is a great thing. And if anyone doesn't see that and stops because you have some scars on your face, then well, they're fucking stupid.  And I've thought about asking you out ever since the day I moved in."

 

***************************

 

They fell into silence after that. Loki could feel a knot twisting in his gut and felt like he just made a total ass of himself. He finally cleared his throat and said "I'm sorry for my behavior, it was very rude.." He looked up and saw the Aussie looking at him, his eyes never leaving his face, but mainly his eyes.

The Brit swallowed and said "Things have been...The last ten years have been hell...And it's been very difficult for me. Believe it or not, but love hasn't come to me, I don't have seas of people slaughtering each other for my attention, you're the only one whose asked me out in a very long time...Again, forgive my rudeness...But this, all this, I'm just not used to anymore..."

The Aussie gave him a warm, real smile and said "I understand. The last couple years haven't been easy for me, either...But I'm very happy that you said yes earlier, and I hope I won't make an ass of myself."

Loki smiled and said "Me either. And I'm happy too."

 

***************************

 

They sat and talked for nearly two more hours before leaving. Chris opened the door and the car door for him, which he also did earlier, and Loki thanked him. They talked in the car and didn't stop talking until they reached Loki's door.

The Brit smiled and said "I had a great time, tonight...Thank you."

Chris smiled and said "I did too...And hopefully we can do this again soon."

Loki nodded and said "Yes, let's do that..." He hesitated at first, wanting to just lean in and kiss him, but worried that would be bad, until he realized Chris kept moving his eyes from Loki's, down to his lips. And he didn't back or turn away when the Aussie leaned in and kiss him. The first time Loki's been kissed in a long time.

It was nice, sweet, but Chris was uncertain. Loki pushed those thoughts out of his head when he kissed him back. After a moment, Loki wondered if they were gonna move this into his flat as they continues to kiss. But then Chris pulled back and smiled. The Brit was a little disappointed but happy at the same time. Chris smiled and said "Goodnight, Loki." Kissing him again, before pulling away.

"Goodnight." Loki answered, watching as Chris made his way down the hall before stopping in front of his own door. He looked over at the Brit, still smiling as he unlocked his door, before heading inside. Loki turned and unlocked his before heading inside, shutting and locking it behind him.

He turned and pressed his back against the door, splaying a hand over his heart. "Goodness..." He said, thinking that he hasn't been kissed like that in so long, maybe never, before heading over to the couch.

He wanted to kick himself for not trying to stop him from leaving, wanting to know if Chris was a believer in sex on the first date, but didn't wanna force the man. Hell he got to make out with him after one date, that was plenty of happiness in itself. He just wonders what could happen on the next date, whenever that may be.

**Author's Note:**

> I know the chin scar is on the left in the picture, but picture it on the right.


End file.
